Too Close to Home
by Scarbie
Summary: Watching Otacon play videogames gives Snake nightmares. Rated T for mild language and violence. "What the hell, Otacon? Is that robot jet-skiing?"


Title: Too Close to Home  
Fandom: Metal Gear Solid  
Genre: Angst Humor  
Summary: Watching Otacon play videogames gives Snake nightmares.  
Rating: T  
Word Count: 1,667

* * *

Explosions everywhere! Widespread chaos! And one man was behind it all. The discordant sounds were music to his ears and it made him redouble his efforts to destroy everything in sight. He laughed as the foolhardy forces walked right into the liquid fire he created with a pull of a trigger.

"Hahahahaha! Do you know who I am?" He asked in crazed tones as his victims were engulfed in flames. The only answers they could provide were their tortured screams.

He continued his rampage. "Taste my pain, bitch!"

As he was entering in the zone a sound disturb him. It was amazing that he could hear it over all of the explosions and grating metal.

The sound was a phone ringing.

Otacon paused the action by pressing start on his Playstation 3 controller. He reached over and grabbed the corded phone. More secure than a cordless one. He was greeted with a familiar voice.

"Oh hey, Dave!" He listened to what his friend had to say. "You want to discuss the plans? Sure, I'm not doing anything. See you then."

It would take Snake about an half-hour to get there so Otacon decided he would get as far as he could in the game until his partner arrived.

He was on level two and having a hard time clearing it.

"It really sucks that the character dies with one hit," Otacon thought as he got blasted away yet again. Instead of continuing from where he left off he restarted the level.

The self-proclaimed otaku got a little bit further along due to memorizing the enemies patterns after so many deaths. The doorbell was his cue to take a break. He hit the 'flashback' button on his remote control before getting up to answer the door. Didn't want to have the image of the game burnt into his expensive TV screen.

"You got something to eat?" Snake said without preamble.

Otacon had to laugh. "Hello to you too. Yeah, I got some stuff for sandwiches. Come on in."

"That'll work. I brought some beer," Snake said as he lifted a six-pack.

Snake made roast beef sandwiches for the two of them and made sure not to put any mayo on Otacon's. The two men worked as they ate and after the sandwiches and six-pack of beer were gone they decided they could take a break. Otacon got up to return the files and notes to his office.

Snake made himself comfortable on the couch in Otacon's living room and flipped through the channels. As he did this, he came across one where the image didn't change. Maybe Otacon was looking at a movie before he stopped by. It looked like a shot of a desolate ocean in the daytime.

"Otacon, you watching a DVD?"

The scientist peeped out the door. "No, I was playing a game."

Snake took a look at his watch. "You had it on pause for two hours? You couldn't," the man groped for the correct word, "save it?"

As Otacon walked back into the living room he shook his head. "No way! The game is too hardcore for that! You have to play it in one sitting!"

Snake thought that sounded crazy. People didn't have time to just sit in front of a TV playing videogames all day.

"It looks kinda boring," the espionage artist said, pointing to the TV. The on-screen scenery didn't give an impression of being 'hardcore.'

The engineer knew that it was anything but boring. "That's only because the game is paused, Dave."

"What's the name of this "hardcore" game, anyway?" Snake asked, putting hardcore in air quotation marks.

"Contra."

Snake eyes narrowed. "Contra? As in 'against' in Spanish?" He didn't sound impressed.

Otacon put the controller down and turned to Snake. The older man instantly recognized the scientist's stance. Otacon was entering into 'lecture' mode.

"Actually that's a good question. It's a long story. In the kanji..."

Snake got the sudden sinking feeling in his stomach that he usually got when he walked right into Otacon's lengthy lectures about what the underlying meaning of an anime was. It was strange that Otacon could do that but not give a straightforward or correct explanation of a simple proverb. Don't get him started with the grass is greener on the other side.

Snake's eyes started to glaze over as he looked at the television. "You know what? Don't worry about that. Just show me what the game looks like."

Otacon didn't get a chance to look downcast. Snake knew the engineer's temperament well enough that he knew exactly what to say. Now when he made Otacon upset, it was usually deliberate.

"Oh, all right," said the slighter man.

The paused game didn't even hint at the amount of activity and craziness that would come across the screen.

"How the hell can you concentrate with all those explosions?"

Otacon said, "Someone could ask you the same thing." He never took his eyes off the TV.

Snake scoffed and slouched deeper into the couch. "Usually if there are that many explosions I've screwed up somehow. Well, with the exception of actually blowing up a Metal Gear. That's definitely my intention. Damn, you died again."

"I know. That's what I'm telling you. This game is tough! You can't even get hit once without dying."

Snake nodded his head. "At least that's realistic. Look at what your character is up against."

Snake figured that Otacon had reached the "boss" of the level. When he saw what it was he was ready to get up and leave. He thought that the Metal Gear Ray was bad with the mech being amphibious and all.

"What the hell, Otacon? Is that robot jet-skiing?"

Otacon tilted his head to the side. "Huh, it is." He chuckled a little bit. "That's kinda funny, isn't Snake?"

The other man grunted. "Not really. Wait. It's got a whip too?" This game was like a train wreck. Snake wanted to walk away because it steadily got more ridiculous but he couldn't tear himself away. After a while he started to notice a pattern to the enemy's movement but Otacon didn't seem to pick up on it as quickly as he did. Snake kept trying to help Otacon out but it was only irritating his friend.

"No Otacon, you need to go to the lower left hand corner and wait 2 and a third seconds!"

"What? Two and a third seconds, Snake? Listen to yourself. You're turning into a backseat gamer. Why don't you take the controller?"

"I don't want it!" Snake said.

Otacon chose the 'continue from midpoint' option and said, "Whatever." Snake smirked when he saw that Otacon took his advice and finally beat the large robot. He kept the "I told you so" to himself.

Snake stayed a bit longer and laughed at some of Otacon's more colorful outburst when the man's character died.

"Otacon, I'm seeing a different side of you. It's rather frightening."

"Keep laughing, Dave."

"Actually, I think I've seen enough of this game. Maybe in some strange way it's hitting a little too close to home," the scruffy man said.

Otacon was quiet for a moment. "I see what you mean. This game's world is like if the Metal Gear situation we have now ran unchecked and all the bad guys were brilliant crack heads."

Snake raised one of his eyebrows and stood. "That's one way to put it."

"Well, thankfully there's a guy like you to keep that from happening."

Snake was quite touched by that statement. It was a bit embarrassing really. "I thought you were over that hero-worship stuff, Otacon. And don't sell yourself short either." The smile he gave the other man reached his eyes.

"I'm just telling the truth. Plus, after spending a full day with you outside of repelling off buildings and blowing up helicopter scenarios kinda cured me of the hero-worshipping." This actually wasn't completely true. Hal still found Dave to be a man that was worth admiring. It was just that knowing the agent outside of his element showed a more human side to the man. It showed him "Dave."

Snake laughed again. "Considering how long you were on that videogame we got a lot accomplished tonight. Gonna head out now and I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"All right. When you go dealing with those people, please don't overact. I know you've got your sportcoat picked out and everything but don't be a goof."

Snake put his hand to his chest, clearly offended. Before he could say anything to protest Otacon gave him a stern look over his glasses.

"How do you do, ma'am? Henry Swanson's my name and excitement's my game," Otacon said, trying to imitate his friend's distinctively gruff voice but if it were filtered through a Ned Flanders golly-gee-whiz-a-rizer.

"I did not sound like that!"

"Oh yes, you did. Please do not use that line." He also stood and walked Snake to the door. "I mean it. Don't say that. They'll probably shoot you on site. Now get a good night's rest."

"Okay," Snake said. "Good night."

***************

Once Snake got home he got ready for bed but he wouldn't be able to say he had a good night's rest. Every time he closed his eyes, scenes from Otacon's Contra game would come to mind. And instead of a practically featureless sprite going against all those mechanical monstrosities, it was Snake.

On his third time waking up he turned on the lights and looked at the ugly outfit he had picked out for tomorrow's meeting.

He definitely wouldn't let the world get as bad as that game. Mainly because he didn't want to be a one-hit wonder or anyone else to be either. And in all honesty, he didn't know if he would be able to go up against a jet-skiing robot.

"Why couldn't Otacon play one of his damn zombie games? Those don't faze me at all." Snake grumbled as he turned off the lights and tried yet again to go to sleep.

* * *

**A/N**: I always felt that the _Contra_ universe is what would happen if Solid Snake didn't exist. As ridiculous as _Metal Gear_ can be _Contra_ is so much worse. So good job, Snake.

I totally stole the "Henry Swanson" line from _Big Trouble in Little China_ (BTiLC). The outfit I see Snake wearing to that meeting is just like the disguise that Jack Burton wore to the whorehouse in _BTiLC_. And Snake already kinda had his hair like that when he was Iroquois Pliskin in _MGS2_. Oh, the side part in his hair. LOL!

Can't you see Otacon being the violent type when he plays videogames?


End file.
